Now thinking about why friends take advantage of us, this article Toothless is beautiful happy birthday cognitive dissonance might give some clues about the way in which we allow them to do it. Given this theory it seems that we try and 'reduce' dissonance to start with by trying to justify the normality of the situation . Thinking like ' well s/he would never be trying to stich me up', then as the dissonace becomes too great we reach a 'crunch point' and we realise that 'yes' they would and 'yes' they have. The next phase is reflecting on the realisation and retrospectively 'making sense' of all the things that have happened in light of our new found viewpoint. With luck - we learn and change. Cognitive Dissonance is the extreme emotional discomfort we feel when important beliefs, attitudes or perceptions collide. Humans cannot tolerate dissonance for long, so they ease the tension by making a change in belief or attitude—and justifying the change.
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